[This is what Carolina has written from Argentina as a reaction to what I wrote in my past Web (April 15) under the title “I don’t tie myself down to a bloke”. It has touched me, and here it is.]

Carolina:
“I don’t tie myself down to a bloke”: I felt moved when reading your piece. I’m 27, I live with a man though we haven’t married. It seemed safer to try and see how we got on together, to read between the lines, not to commit ourselves hundred per cent. It looks sad but it is true, and, even more, almost all young people my age take up the same attitude. Maybe that’s the reason why (I’m just thinking aloud) adolescence now lengthens, we don’t want responsibility nor anything that may tie us down, we simply adapt ourselves to the times in which we happen to live. It has to be noted that many of us, at least in my case, come from families where the parents have separated, we lived through their fights, we were their “luggage”, we understood them but we suffered at the same time with them. So we grow up thinking it is better not to commit ourselves too much. At times you have to get a degree in a hurry, since suddenly you are rated too old for some jobs and without experience for others. The little money you can get you use to hire a flat in which to go in for the “love test”. Hence the common attitude, Why should I marry if I’m fine as I am? Or rather, we don’t quite seem to fit in together, so it’s better to leave it at that and if it comes to that, I quit. I think that is our sad reality. It would be good to learn that what is most comfortable is not necessarily what is best, and even if we take our partner lightly, to give him at least the respect he deserves. Greetings to all!

I:
I’ve been touched by your letter, Carolina. It is so clear and so sincere! And thank you for giving me permission to put it on my Web. I seldom do that, but your writing is exceptional and I’m going to put it. As you well say there is no question of condemning any attitude but of understanding all and of feeling and expressing respect for all. What hurt me when writing my article last time was the language of that advertisement on a billboard in the street (“I don’t tie myself down to a bloke”), and that prompted me to write what you read in my last Web (15 April). You show a deep respect for your partner and your life, and I admire you and stand by you. I’m impressed at seeing how fast your young years pass so that, in spite of having your whole life in front of you, you soon feel rejected from some jobs. That must be awful. I’m 82 and I’m fond of saying that life begins at 80. For you to cheer up. That is to say, life begins wherever you are, at 20, at 40, at 80. Each stage has to be lived out in full. One can have a very good time at my age. It helps to have a good hobby, as writing in my case, and close friends that cheer up my life. As you have cheered me up with your charm and your trust. Thank you, Carolina, in my name and in the name of all those that may read what you wrote. You are not alone. Kisses, Carlos.